Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
