you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize