ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
