the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
