tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Randomize
