one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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