What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
