she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
