elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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