What did we do last night that was yellow?
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
