And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
