I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
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