he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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