haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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