is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
