Whod you bang
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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