Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize