1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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