I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
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