just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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