You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Randomize
