I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize