yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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