Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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