Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
