he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Floor bacon is actually really good
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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