you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
