i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Randomize
