Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
A+ Viking dick
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize
