i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Randomize
