so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
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