I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
