Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
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