Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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