you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
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