Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
