Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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