just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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