as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize