Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
