I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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