none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
