I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
The adults are the big ones right?
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize