Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
i think my mom watched the whole time
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
