idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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