my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
