I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
