if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
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