Where is the hickey?
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
either way he was missing a nipple.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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