I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
