I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Randomize
