Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Randomize
